Thursday, January 27, 2011

Ranting of a confused mind

I have 6 to 8 unfinished blog posts in my laptop
I have changed 4 jobs in less than 1 and a half years of working
I have quit a job in the United Nations
I have changed cities in between that too
I have been working in this company for months now and dunno how long more I will

And people knowing all this ask me “whats my aim in life?” “whats my ambition in life?”. I have been asked this question way too many times under various circumstances. Right from the day I completed my matriculation, right after my higher secondary schooling and many a time during my graduation and post graduation. The question has popped in many forms and types. Now when I think about it, let me reassure you I STILL DON'T KNOW. I have no clue whats my ambition/aim in life.

I don't know what I am doing.
I don't know where I am heading
I don't know what I want to do
I don't know if I will earn enough ever
I don't know anything...

I ask is it necessary to have an aim? That makes life much less interesting. That is like closing your eyes to great temptations in life and going on a single flight up, not knowing what would be the scene if not.

On the contrary I have started to believe in the concept of 'nihilism'. Maybe there is no purpose in life. As long as you can make ends meet, as long as you take care of your responsibilities life has to go on. Maybe you are just another brick in the wall, maybe you are just another cog in a machine.

Let me end this in a positive note:

I know I am confused
I know I am caught in the crossroads...


  1. @ Soliloquy: Maybe yes man..but when I look around I understand that more than others I have got addicted to uncertainty, which I don't think is a good thing too.

  2. True life story!
    For me too, slash some details here and there :P

  3. Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!! Cheers to not having answers! :D Today, I turned 25 and I still have the same things to say about myself. I have NO IDEA where I'm going...but I still enjoy the freedom of not knowing :D

  4. @ Blogavathy: what details do u want slashed?
    @ Ray of moon light: Yes indeed, uncertainity is a cruel mistress.

  5. Same here bro. Nihilism is the way to salvation. Down with all those focused people around us !